They took me away in what seemed like heavy chains
They clinked and dragged along the hard floor while my heart fluttered and sank
Go and don’t come back I heard..it rang in my ears while my heart jumped in shock
Your doctor is dismissing you because there aren’t enough drugs in your system.
I forgot that the bottle said “take as needed”
I forgot I was without my other meds by their mistake
I forgot it all.
I didn’t see what the paper said, the words floated in jumbled up clouds
While my heart sank to the floor
And all I could hear was the chains dragging me down
He pushed the paper to my face and thrust the pen at me
Saying your doctor said to sign here..
All I could see was a blur and I could not get my eyes to focus on the paper
All I could hear was your doctor wants you discharged and you did not take the pills as prescribed. Someone signed the page with a bewildered look, it was me. Usually so “with it”, so “on the ball”. No more. He took my dignity in an instant.
And it came pouring back to me..he asked me if I wanted to hurt someone
He asked me if I was beaten at home or in danger when the only danger I felt was this chair, this room spinning around, out of focus, sign the paper he said, sign the paper. My heart hit the floor. My tears blocked my view. I didn’t even see the words on the paper but I didn’t want him to know how hard I tried to read them but could not. I could not see the words.
He stripped me of my dignity. Does it matter I’d been there 8 long years or that I love my doctor, respected him and felt nothing but gratitude for the life he gave to me with his treatments. He really told this PA, this fake doctor to discharge me? No, couldn’t be, my heart hit the floor while my eyes welled up. In one foul, mean spirited swoop he stripped me of my dignity.
In the distance I heard the pharmacists voices calling me a drug addict, while the room spinned and the paper blurred. I heard all my other doctors follow in a long line call me an addict too and heard all of them say, please leave, your doctor is dismissing you. My heart hit the floor. I heard the chains dragging.
He stripped me of my heart and I can hear my dignity in chains drag across the endless floor.
